Life.
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Hi

yesterday my mum had a sudden breathing difficulty in the evening. she was warded into the hospital by an ambulance. The ride to the hospital, was scary. Everything happened in a flash and by night time, she was well again, cracking jokes like she did in the morning. At night i cried so much.. It made me felt so heartbroken to see her like that. I shall post what happened exactly next time. It made me reflect about how fragile life is… and no doubt it’s as fragile as the life of an ant’s…

ive recalled the whole incident in my head countless times when we got home, till now. Even when im writing this now, my hair is standing, my heart is racing.

Please, i pray that all of us will be blessed with good health. Including myself. My breathing problem is getting frequent by the day.. it’s scary. it really is. sigh

x


Year 2011
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Friends
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What am i doing here? Feeling angst and sad at this timing? when i have to wake up at 7am to study for Ground Handling exam tomorrow? You know how im feeling? a mixture of ‘sour’, heartache. Because i cant believe what i saw, i cant stop thinking n imagining things. im so paranoid. i cant tell anybody how im feeling; cuz they judge me.


Internship
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Today is the last day of school and i didnt even realise it until 15minutes to the end of the class. cant believe how long ive been studying in TP.. Im only left with half of the the 3 years here. Wow look how long ive been messing with all the people in school? hah

Soon enough, kor will be going america for 6months. And me, on the other hand, will be starting my internship. Even though it’s about 6months away, it seems pretty near to me.

im in such a dilemma. today gary, our lecturer, told us about the opening of registration for internship at Cathay Pacific. there’s about 10positions; 3 on airport, 7 on airlines (town office). somehow i cant seem to make any decisions after the dream of being an air stewardess has been crushed in the hands/laughters of my classmates. Actually i knew that i wouldnt be able to make it.. but i still held hopes up high anyway. Oh, silly me. Guess i can only envy my classmates, and do office job for 6months………….

We were only informed about the Cathay intern this afternoon and guess what, the dateline is tomorrow! i dont even have enough time to consider… however i think i will pass this time round more or less. being the 1st company to be opened up to us, i can predict there will be alot of people signing up for it! My mind is currently set on JAL.. reason being it’s a japan airline and i always have a fetish for Japan. Who knows i might be working in japan next time considering the fact that im gonna continue in studying Japanese? Hmm.

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Hectic week
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December has arrived and seriously, i couldnt help agree with the other people who complaint about how fast this year has gone by.

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This whole week was spent doing last minute assignments, project and TESTS. On Monday, our class had to do a presentation on ground handling and to submit a report on it. On Wednesday, we had ORGCOMM letter writing quiz and on Thursday, we had 3quizzes. 1) Security & Surveillance quiz, 2)project management quiz, 3) airfield labtest (which turned out to be a lab session). in addition, we had to submit our 1000word assignment on Airfield system!

oh and not forgetting mummy’s birthday! Monday’s dinner was spent celebrating at AMK Hub’s fish and co. i had to take a longer bus ride (past my usual stop) to reach there. I was already dog-tired! However the birthday dinner was lovely. It was damn cold inside and together with the orangey lightings and the snowflakes (and other xmas decorations on the wall) actually made us felt like we’re having dinner in USA. All of us couldnt help agree with it. halfway through we connected with my second brother who is in London through Whatsapp. We spammed our camera and took videos and sent it across the ocean to my brother. We had a good laugh. Birthday cake was Rive Gauche’s longan cake.

Phew. im so glad i pulled through this week and my weekend was quite well spent. On Friday morning, along with pa, i accompanied mummy to her radiotherapy session. After which i decided that we should go to Santouka for lunch. I totally forgot about my Santouka card, which we could have actually redeem a plate of pork cheek. And after lunch pa decided that he should get me a new wallet because i really need a new one. The minnie mouse have been dropping off despite me gluing it back ;( i really love my red wallet because it’s a gift from Nic and i have been using it ever since Sec3?
So, we went Centrepoint in search for my new wallet. but somehow we stumbled into Mango and pa got me a pair of new stretchy jeans for my HUGEEEEE WAIST, and a top. Believe it or not, they are my first purchase from Mango other than hand-me-downs. :-)

we continued looking for my wallet. Actually i was looking for the Guy Laroche wallet which i have been eyeing on for months. however the colour i wanted was all out of stock even in Taka’s dept. We went timberland because pa wanted to get me a leather wallet but unfortunately, it was all sold out again.

i think my red wallet can still last me for a while so in the meantime im not gonna change. And being a picky person, it’ll take me even longer to decide on one!!

Yesterday was spent with my section and with Peixiang. i think i’ll write a separate entry soon. Maybe tonight or tomorrow. Meanwhile, i shall stop procrastinating and start doing tutorials or revision!!

Before i even forget, HAPPY BDAY KORs!! Tonight’s dinner will be at Swensens ;-) Too bad my second brother wouldnt be here. But on hindsight, he’ll be having a snowy birthday !!


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It has been quite a long time since the last entry isnt it? Suddenly got struck by the thought of writing an entry... i was reading pj's blog which is mostly filled up with robin and her dates! kindof made me think of the old times... 

i think im a very headstrong person. Nobody can stop me from what im doing if im determined to complete it. It applies to relationship too. Frankly speaking, i STILL cant seem to put an end to it. In fact, yesterday i was crying because i got scolded by him :( it felt really bad.. The usual routine happened: i waited for him till super late, i called, then he got annoyed that i was asking for more than just a goodnight, then he gave me a tongue lashing

when i was reading pj's blog, i could really feel the joy she feels as she's writing the entries... Kindof reminded me of my own happy entries i always write whenever i meet up with peixiang when we were together. Really miss the times... Now everything have changed. 

the replies to sms... got even shorter than before. it's like, 'Yes" or "ok" or "k"... etc. And when we talk on the phone, it wont last more than 15minutes? Ok, maybe on occasions when i beg him :P 

i know many od my friends are telling me that im not even letting go! how can i expect myself to forget him/relationship? i tried (i swear) but i couldnt make myself do it. everytime i see my phone, it's like staring back at me, telling me "text him!!!!". As if there's this kind of invisible force attracting me to it.. 

i dont know what am i doing, really. My mind is all messed up.. i cant make a decision. Even if i did, i wouldnt have been disciplined enough to keep to it. Everyday i wish we can be closer, but it seems otherwise. Monday will come very soon... All i ask for is to have a little private time with him every day. 


Enjoy the halloween weekends! (Note: Met up with him last Friday. Took a pic and added a moustache for him cuz he had swollen upper lip)

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Burn all textbooks and exam papers!
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i miss studying Jap :(
My classmate asked me if i want to learn tgt with him?
But then he is migrating to Australia soon.

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hm.. Im excited for Japan trip ;) Cant wait.

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Random.
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Need a new space to start recording my new life.

I finally understand why my cousin (who is married w a kid now) did not take her diary with her to her new home. When i was about 10/11 years old, i found her diary in my grandpa’s cupboard. The same cupboard which she kept all her books. I happened to find her diary and i read a few pages of it. She wrote about her boyfriend (first boyfriend) and there was a picture of him too. Maybe memories should just be kept as memories, somewhere in the mind and not somewhere we will be reminded of, everytime we happen to see it.

Just like this blog. im thinking if i should leave our memories here and start anew somewhere?

P.s. Happy National Day, hope yours was a good one.


The exact thing i wrote in my notebook.
chinatown
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lifeliveson:-you’re the one that I hold onto, cause my heart would stop without you-photolink

But ive moved on.


From Attic’s secret;
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icanread:(by aqeela)

This is for you, if u are reading. Im sorry


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